Memories Of Her

SHE GOT WELL(Healed)

In her eyes I saw fear of pain

My tears were like rain

They flooded my paper universe

Left me with no place to write my verse

To relief my stress

Seeing her in pain made me cry

Knowing I'm not gonna see her again makes me wanna cry

At least in pain she could respond

I wanted to take her place as her youngest boy

It was this day 11 years ago

That one day when daddy came back home from the Hospital

He said, "o fodile"

She got well

He meant,  "o ile"

...she's not coming back

My favourite spoon became the worst that day

I choked on food from it when I ate

It used to dig the food she prepared on my plate

Why did it have to be the 1 to dig my mom's grave?

Why did it have to be the 1 to cause me pain?

I know it was time

Not my time but God's time

I still remember the day

The year 2004, 18th Of May

When daddy came back home from the Hospital 

He said "o fodile"

She got well

He meant, "o ile"...

...and she's not coming back

By Rufus "Roof-Top" Mashao (18-05-2004)

Yes she got well. She was very sick in Hospital & stayed there for few weeks just before she departed from the painless life of the flesh. Heaven is a place for people like her, beautiful and strong. True believer in the Lord, she loved music so much her normal day was a song and a special one would be singing it with all her kids being home. That prayer she said every Sunday just before we all left for our places of work & schools was the feast for the spirit & motivation our belief in God and ourselves. Eleven years later I stumbled upon my poetry book from when she was still alive. It felt like someone wrote all those poems except the Poem above, "She Got Well"...

...as I could remember vividly the tears that dropped on the very page I jotted a Poem to celebrate her life. That watermark was the signature of life turning it's pages of her last chapter, I wanted to know who writes the book because I was the one who wrote her the only Poem she never got to read. I don't know how, but eleven years later my eyes still get teary when I think of the best memories of my life with her, I remember my mom in happy way. And, today I shall rejoice in the Lord & make happiness for myself by honouring the woman who gave me more than life. The wisdom to never let a moment pass without writing about it, this moment is for you & me momma. And as I have always marked this day in the diary of my heart, so shall the son of my son. Memories don't live like people do and that be the reason I continue to write you again today, on behalf of me & all my siblings. Your "Memories Shall Live Forever In Us".

Tigers Don't Cry, Men Do...

It was the era of BMX and we were out as boys to display our skills to the community members that never understood why we’d put ourselves in the line of danger. According to most people I knew when growing up thought doing tricks on a BMX was dangerous, yes maybe it was by that time because I broke 2 of my hands at the same time with the first accident I had. As a young boy all I wanted to be was a stunt-man hence it came with a lot of pain & fractures, unforeseen circumstances that gives me a chill on my spine now as an older man. I am grateful to be alive & in one piece, now being older & more cautious I look back to my dreams to a realization that I was made for something else. It was 1988 when I first got my first BMX trick-bike, it was my aunt who bought it and she thought it would help with me when being sent to the shops time & again. It would mean that I will always come back sooner and also give me more time to exercise since I was a fat/chubby kid when I was growing up, my aunt would go jogging with me riding my BMX just in front of her.

                                          

Just a decade after being injured by my first bicycle I got involved in a car accident that could make an old man cry like a baby, it would make creative minds want to make a movie about it. It was my best friend driving & only one person was physically injured out of the 4 of us in that Ford Laser 1.6i sport - 1996 model, we were hit by a truck that smashed us against the bridge wall on Jan Smuts Avenue going into Randburg. That was trauma & a half, the ambulances came after an hour and none of us had a cell-phone to call our families or close relatives hence it was in the middle of the night where we were on our way to an after party of a Hip-Hop Summit that was help in Germiston the East of Johannesburg. I know you are reading & thinking the driver was obviously drunk & NO you are wrong to think that, we went out of our way to find a sober driver which didn't change fate of us being involved in an accident. We were all taken to Milpark Hospital along with our injured friend, it was just for safety for us to be checked for internal injuries or fractures. Sitting on one of those non-comfortable hospital chairs at the waiting area I heard a nurse call out my name, I tried so hard to stand up to approach her only to find that I couldn't stand or walk. I felt a pain on my spine towards the waist, as if something had just cut me in half. A few seconds later I couldn't feel my legs, horrifying as it was I screamed to the nurse to call my house. My imagination took a wrong turn & saw me bound to a wheel chair that left me crying for those walks I said no to. Yes I was crying, tell me which man wouldn’t. Yet I could only remember my uncle telling me that I’m a tiger, which I guess most of us boys when we grow up being told that we’re tigers & we should know that “Tigers Don’t Cry”. From that moment on I had my twist it all, I agree with them when they say “Tigers Don’t Cry” but “Men Do. What would be a man without tear drops in his past if not the present, a smile on his face time & again and that laugh that expresses the intellectuals of identifying that crazy joke. What would be a man without loving a woman, being alive & knowing what it feels like to be in love? I know at times we need to be brave & endure the pain hence the biggest pain I know is the one of a man keeping his pain a secret. Yes Tigers Don’t Cry, Men Do…Men do love, live, smile, talk, sing, dance & etc. Men do that because they are men & yes they can be Tigers but Tigers can’t be men, so go on & share your pain. #SomeoneCares